Of course it's hard. If it was easy then everybody would do it. Its the hard that makes it great

Hey there!! Sorry it has been awhile since I posted. Alot has happened since the last time I wrote. I spent all day Friday with the kid James and had a great day. He is real cute and super sweet. Even though he lives 3.5 hours away he didn't leave until 11:30 at night and wants to come down again soon. I'm embarressed to say this but that was my first date ever. I know it's kind of hard to believe but I think it has something to do with my self esteem issues. I just have never felt that I am good enough for somebody to actually want to spend time with me. I'm messed up I know!!! But in the end, I really like him and really wish that he lived closer cause this distance thing is just not making me happy...

Weight wise it has been going well too!! I hit 195 today! I weighed in at 195.6 this morning. I am not going to count this as my goal weight because when you round up it is actually 196. But I am so close I can almost feel it!!! I'm going to eat dinner and then hit the gym, maybe a little harder so that hopefully I am under 195 tomorrow morning. Wish me luck!!